Don’t you want something different?

RAL 2016 (09-19) 03

The puppy who’s no longer a puppy has been fed, walked, watered and thrown balls to.

Well, they weren’t actually balls. They were actually pieces of penne pasta, if you must know.

This puppy who’s no longer a puppy likes the half-crunchy-half-chewy pieces from the top of the casserole. So she gets them thrown across the room and she chases them down.


She’s not too spoiled.

So let’s see. We’d covered two points so far in previous essays:

(1) Don’t be upset if the Person With Depression (PWD) can’t always keep your schedule; and

(2) Don’t take it personally if the PWD drops off of the face of the earth.

So, that brings us to the third helpful lesson we learn from Rob Kardashian‘s life and his family’s responses to his depression (as witnessed by me from my obsessive viewing of Keeping Up with the Kardashians and Rob and Chyna)

(3) The Person With Depression (PWD) most likely isn’t choosing for his or her life to be this way. 


I cringe every time I hear any person who doesn’t suffer from depression asking WHY the PWD is being this way, as if the PWD is choosing to stay in bed, choosing to stay at home, choosing to be completely lifeless and choosing to be completely hopeless.

Think about it folks, especially you folks who don’t experience major depression.

Who in the world would want to volunteer for depression?

It’s so hard to explain to people that depression takes over your body and mind. It consumes you to the point that you can’t control it because it’s controlling you.

Depression takes over, making choice an irrelevant factor after a certain point.

I know, I know.

You’re saying “But you DO have a choice.”

And yes.  Yes, there are points where the PWD has choices.

But those points are NOT during the time of crisis.

During the time of crisis is NOT the time to ask why the PWD is choosing to be this way.

Choices are a topic of conversation better left for when the PWD is feeling better.

Choices are a topic of conversation for when the PWD has more control over the depression than the depression has over the PWD.

When the PWD is in the throes of depression, your job as a family member or friend is simple: help them to get through it and then help them to get out of it.

And if you’ve never been in the throes of serious depression, chronic depression or major depression, just know that it’s awful.  It is painful and upsetting and full of constant reminders that life won’t get better.

It’s worse than you can imagine.

So, for the PWD, hearing a family member or friend question why one would choose that way of life isn’t helpful.

It’s just more hurt on top of the already hurtful hurting.

Okay, that’s enough about depression for one day.

Hope you’re more down than up this fine day. And more yes than no.

Time for me to paint some pretty paintings.

Enjoy your version of painting, whatever it is.

xoxo, d
Giving real life stories value, purpose and power.

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